N. N. Pillai (Narayana Pillai Narayanan Pillai, 1918–1995) — : The famous Malayalam playwright, actor, and satirist. He provided a classic humorous explanation of different political and economic systems using the “goat example” (sometimes a cow in Western jokes, but Pillai used goats to make it more local and humorous).
N. N. Pillai’s “Goat Example” Explanation of Political Systems
- Capitalism
- “You have two goats. You sell one and buy a he-goat. They multiply. You sell the kids. You get rich.”
→ Private ownership, profit motive, reinvestment.
- “You have two goats. You sell one and buy a he-goat. They multiply. You sell the kids. You get rich.”
- Communism
- “You have two goats. The Government takes both and gives you the milk.”
→ State ownership, redistribution, no private property.
- “You have two goats. The Government takes both and gives you the milk.”
- Socialism
- “You have two goats. You keep one and give the other to your neighbor.”
→ Sharing of resources, equality principle.
- “You have two goats. You keep one and give the other to your neighbor.”
- Bureaucracy
- “You have two goats. Government takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and throws the milk away.”
→ Inefficiency of government machinery.
- “You have two goats. Government takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and throws the milk away.”
- Nazism / Fascism
- “You have two goats. The Government takes both and shoots you.”
→ Authoritarian, violent suppression.
- “You have two goats. The Government takes both and shoots you.”
- Democracy
- “You have two goats. Your neighbor decides who should milk them.”
→ People elect representatives, but control may still be indirect.
- “You have two goats. Your neighbor decides who should milk them.”
- Feudalism
- “You have two goats. Your landlord takes both goats and leaves you some dung as rent.”
→ Exploitation by landlords.
- “You have two goats. Your landlord takes both goats and leaves you some dung as rent.”
Pillai’s brilliance was that he localised the globally circulated “two cows theory” into goats, which made Malayali audiences laugh because goats were a part of everyday village life. But the satire cut deep—it showed how every system, however grand in theory, looks absurd in practice when reduced to ordinary life.
N. N. Pillai–Style “Two Goats” Expanded to Modern Systems
System | Goat Example | Key Message |
---|---|---|
Capitalism | You have two goats. You sell one and buy a he-goat. They breed. You sell the kids and get rich. | Private ownership, profit, reinvestment. |
Communism | You have two goats. The government takes both and gives you the milk. | State ownership, redistribution. |
Socialism | You have two goats. You keep one and give the other to your neighbor. | Equality, resource sharing. |
Bureaucracy | You have two goats. The government takes both, kills one, milks the other, and throws the milk away. | Red tape, inefficiency. |
Fascism / Nazism | You have two goats. The government takes both and shoots you. | Authoritarianism, violent suppression. |
Democracy | You have two goats. Your neighbor decides who should milk them. | People’s vote, indirect power. |
Feudalism | You have two goats. Your landlord takes both and gives you dung as rent. | Exploitation by landlords. |
Anarchism | You have two goats. You keep them, your neighbor keeps his, nobody rules. | No government, self-rule. |
Theocracy | You have two goats. The priest declares one belongs to God. | Rule by religion. |
Consumerism | You have two goats. You sell both to buy a luxury car. | Obsession with buying, not need. |
Corporatism | You have two goats. A corporation buys them, and you get hired to milk them. | Corporate dominance. |
Plutocracy | You have two goats. The rich buy them cheap and sell the milk back to you at high price. | Rule of the wealthy. |
Oligarchy | You have two goats. A small group of families decide their fate. | Power by few elites. |
Technocracy | You have two goats. Experts design a system to maximize milk output. | Rule by technical experts. |
Welfare State | You have two goats. You milk them, and the state taxes half to give milk to the poor. | Redistribution, safety net. |
Dictatorship | You have two goats. The dictator takes both and bans you from complaining. | Absolute control. |
Utopianism | You have two goats. Everyone agrees to share all goats equally. | Idealism, rarely practical. |
Gig Economy | You have two goats. You don’t own them; you rent them by the hour through an app. | Precarious, flexible labor. |
Globalization | You have two goats. One grazes locally, the other is sent abroad. You drink milk from another country’s goat. | Interconnected markets, global trade. |
Crony Capitalism | You have two goats. A politician gives you a license to own ten goats because you’re his friend. | Corruption, favoritism. |
Neo-liberalism | You have two goats. You privatize them, deregulate grazing, and export the milk. | Free markets, deregulation, privatization. |
Populism | You have two goats. A leader promises to give you ten more goats, but takes yours instead. | Empty promises to masses. |
Surveillance State | You have two goats. The government installs cameras to watch how you milk them. | Control through monitoring. |
Digital Economy | You have two goats. You create an Instagram page for them and earn money from likes. | Value created online, data economy. |
Gigantic Corporations (Monopoly) | You have two goats. A mega-company buys every goat in the village. You must buy milk only from them. | Market domination, no competition. |
Gigantic Corporations (Monopsony) | You have two goats. Only one company buys goat milk. They set the price. | One-sided market power. |
Climate Capitalism / Green Economy | You have two goats. You put solar panels on their shed and sell “eco-friendly milk” at double price. | Capitalism with green branding. |
What N. N. Pillai did with his “two goats” is essentially a localized, satirical version of the famous Two Cows Theory.
Origin of the “Two Cows Theory”
- It first appeared in Western political humor in the early 20th century, especially around the 1930s–40s.
- Americans and Europeans used two cows to explain capitalism, socialism, fascism, communism, etc.
- Example:
- Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.
- Communism: You have two cows. The state takes both and gives you some milk.
- Fascism: You have two cows. The state takes both and shoots you.
It became popular in pamphlets, joke books, political cartoons, and later on the internet.
What N. N. Pillai Did
- Pillai took this “two cows” model and adapted it for Kerala/Malayali audiences.
- Instead of cows, he used goats, because goats are more common in Kerala’s villages, and the image immediately clicked with ordinary people.
- He also added his own sarcastic twist — sharper, more rooted in Indian reality (like feudalism with goats and dung rent).